The Halfa Hiccups
by ElealehBlue
Summary: Complete! Book One of my 'The Trio Troubles' series. Sequel is up. Danny gets the hiccups; strangeness ensues. Kinda stupid, pre-PP, I'm bad at summaries, K-plus to be safe, enjoy. :)
1. Chapter 1: Trouble

**AN: My second posted story! This ones multiple chapters, but I might combine it into one long chapter, depending on how long it is when complete. Just a wierd little idea I had, that I thought was funny and decided to run with. Tell me if I should continue. Enjoy :)** **P.S. I own nothing but the fingers used to type this.**

 **Cover was made by me, using GIMP and a base by devAT-Bases (PartyBases on DeviantArt, which I do not own). Check them out, they're awesome! :))**

* * *

 **Chapter 1:**

 **Trouble**

* * *

Sam wore a disgusted frown as she sat in the bedroom of one of her two best friends, Danny Fenton. Her frown deepened, as the 'who-can-chug-the-most-soda-the-fastest' contest between Danny and her other best friend, Tucker Foley, continued. So far, Danny was winning, but Tucker was closing in fast. The action and excitement that the two sixteen-year-old boys felt was punctuated by gulping sounds, and highlighted every few seconds by loud burps. The burps were coming so often now that Sam was seriously worried it was turning into a belching contest.

She sighed, shutting the book she had given up on reading. She thought she would be used to strange and disgusting things, seeing as the trio were the greatest team of ghost-hunters in Amity Park, Illinois. Truth be told, they were possibly the greatest ghost-hunters on the planet, since Danny was a halfa, (a half-ghost/half-human hybrid,) and the son of two of the world's leading paranormal scientists.

Apparently, she was wrong. No amount of ghost fighting, interdimensional- and/or time-travel, ectoplasmic-gooping, and accidentally sucking Danny into the Fenton Thermos, (one of Mr. and Mrs. Fenton's ghost-capturing devices,) could ever prepare her for the unpredictable behavior of teenaged boys.

Tucker suddenly let out a long, loud belch, stinking up the entire room. Sam held her nose and Danny waved a hand in front of his face, trying to giggle and hold his breath at the same time. "Heh-heh-heh, Duu-hu-hude-"

 ***Hiccup***

Sudenly, a familiar bright white ring formed around Danny's waist. The ring quickly split in two, one travelling up and the other down Danny's body.

One moment, black-haired, blue-eyed Danny Fenton was sitting backwards in his computer chair, a half-full can of soda in one hand. The next, he was replaced by his white-haired, green-eyed, ghostly alter ego, Danny Phantom. (But, he kept the soda.)

The three teens just stared for a moment, and Danny suddenly realized that he hadn't had the hiccups since before he got his ghost-powers. _This can't be good_ , he thought.

 ***Hiccup***

The rings reappeared, and Fenton was back. _Oh, boy._

"Danny, Honey? Is everything alright, up there? I thought I heard something." Mrs. Fenton called, from the bottom of the stairs.

"Uh... Uh- Yeah, Mom! Everything's fine!" Danny shouted back.

"Well, okay. Your father and I are going to the store. Do you kids need anything, while we're out?"

 ***Hiccup***

Suddenly, Phantom was back. "Uh- N-no, thanks, Mom. W-we're fine," he stammered, nervously, hoping his mother wouldn't notice the slight echo in his voice that came with being in his ghost-form.

"Okay, Sweetie. Jazz is at the library. We'll be back in a little while."

"CALL ME, IF YOU SEE A GHOST!" Danny's father bellowed, followed by the sound of the front door slamming. The teens sat in stunned silence a few seconds longer.

"What. Just. Happened?" Sam finally asked.

"Iiii'm not sure," Danny dragged out, uncertainly.

 ***Hiccup***

Two bright lights, and Danny was in his human-form, again.

"But, I have a bad feeling it's gonna be trouble."


	2. Chapter 2: Laughter Is The Best Medicine

**Chapter 2:**

 **Laughter Is The Best Medicine**

 **(Usually)**

* * *

"Okay," Tucker started, fiddling with something on his ever-present PDA. "Ways to get rid of hiccups. Cure #1: Hold your breath for as long as you can."

 ***Hiccup***

Fenton landed on the couch he had previously been floating over as Phantom. "Hold my breath. Okay."

Danny proceeded to do just that. He and Tucker sat there for what seemed like ages, before Sam came back, carrying a glass of water. "Uh..." She droned, staring at the boys, as she realized what they were doing. "You guys do realize that, being _half-ghost_ , Danny doesn't actually _have_ to breathe, right?"

 ***Hiccup* (Phantom)**

"Riiiiight. Forgot about that." Tucker said sheepishly, as Danny glared at him. "Cure #2:" Tucker continued, pretending not to notice the look. "Hold your nose and drink a glass of water."

Danny took the glass of water from Sam and started to drain it, one hand on his nose. "...Well?" Sam asked.

"Did it work?" Tucker prodded.

Danny waited for a few second. "I'm not su-"

 ***Hiccup* (Fenton)**

"-Nope." Danny finished.

"Oh, here's a new one." Tucker said. Sam and Danny looked over at him. "Cure #3: Think of every bald man you know."

The three just stared at each other blankly, before bursting into laughter.

"That has got to be-" Danny started, between giggles. "the stupidest-"

 ***Hiccup* (Phantom)**

"Well, that crosses off Cure #118: Laugh." Tucker said, checking it off the list on his PDA.

"A hundred and eighteen!? How many are there!?" Danny asked, surprised.

"Uhhhhhhhhh-" Tucker droned as he scrolled down the list. "A lot."

Danny looked at the clock. It was already 4:30. "Uhggggg-"

"I am so dead." Danny moaned.

"Cheer up, dude. We've still got..." Tucker checked his screen, "...two hundred and eleven cures to try." He grinned, optimistically

* * *

 **AN: Hey, guys! I know, it's another short chapter, but this felt like a good place to split. Please read, review, comment. Flame, if you must, but I'm not fireproof. So, unless you want the author to turn into ashes that can't type, I'd wait until the last chapter :)**

 **Also, what do you think of the way I'm putting the *hiccup*s? I tried a bunch of different ways, and decided they needed their own line, because putting which form he's in was getting repetitive, but I needed a way to keep track of which Danny it was. (Even I was having to keep checking back...) So, if anyone can think of a better way to put those, I'll see how they fit.**

 **Anywho, I'll try to make the next chapter longer, but no promises. Once this is done, it might be short enough that I combine it into a oneshot, or it might end up twelve miles long. It depends on how many funny hiccup cures I can find.**

 **The internet is a treasure trove :)**

 **As always, God bless, I hope you enjoyed it, and they need to make a heart emoji on this site, 'cause it turns all of mine into 3s. :)**


	3. Chapter 3: Jazz

**Chapter 3:**

 **Jazz**

* * *

"Cure #11: Sing as loudly as you can." Tucker said. He looked up at Danny, who had his hands on his knees, trying to catch his breath from Cure #10, which had him running laps around the house.

 ***Hiccup* (Phantom)**

Danny straightened, took a deep breath, and started belting out _The Star Spangled Banner_.

"O, say, can you see,"

 ***Hiccup* (Fenton)**

"By the dawn's early light  
What, so proudly, we hailed  
At the twilight's last glea-"

 ***Hiccup* (Phantom)**

"-ming  
Whose broad stripes and bright stars  
Through the perilous fight  
O'er the ramparts we wa-"

 ***Hiccup* (Fenton)**

"Tucker, this isn't work-"

 ***Hiccup* (Phantom)**

"-ing."

Tucker, meanwhile, was on the floor, laughing.

"Well, we've got to figure _something_ out." Sam said, glaring at Tucker, before kicking him in the side with her steel-toed combat boots.

"Ah-ha-OW-ho-ho!" Tucker groaned, still laughing. "Danny," He said, pointing at Sam, accusingly. "Sam kicked me."

Danny looked unimpressed. "You poor -"

 ***Hiccup* (Fenton)**

"- thing."

Tucker grumbled something about under-appreciated tech-support and got to his feet. "Okay," he said, righting his lopsided beret. "Cure #11 is out. Cure #12: Don't do anything; just wait for the next hiccup."

The trio sat in silence for around thirty seconds, before the door opened, and Jazz walked in. "Hey, guys! Whatcha up t-"

 ***Hiccup* (Phantom)**

"Well, that didn't work," Sam said, arms folded, eyes half-lidded as she looked towards Danny's older sister.

"Uhhhhh..." Jazz droned. "What's up?"

"Danny's got the hiccups, and it's messing with his powers." Tucker filled in.

"Wow. How many times has this happened?"

"Never." The trio chorused.

"Oh... Wait. You haven't had the hiccups in over a _year_?!"

"Uhhhh, no?"

"Lucky."

The group sat in silence for a moment, before the gravity of the situation caught up with Jazz. "Wait, you can't control your powers when you hiccup?"

"Uh, Jazz? We _just_ went over this. Like, ten seconds ago. And, it's not all of my pow-"

 ***Hiccup* (Fenton)**

"-ers, I just keep going - and un-going - ghost."

"But, what if Mom and Dad see?" Jazz said, eyes darting around, looking for their parents. "Where are they?"

"One: That's the problem. And, two: they're not home." Danny informed.

"We've been going through a list I found online, trying to get rid of them." Tucker added. "Danny's already tried holding his breath, drinking water, more breathing exercises than I knew existed (and there are _still_ more),-"

 ***Hiccup* (Phantom)**

"-No more breathing exercises!-" Danny cut in, a bit frazzled.

"-swallowing air, running laps, singing as loudly as he can, thinking of bald men, (don't ask,) laughing, and waiting for the next hiccup to come."

"Okay." Jazz was lost in though for a moment, before she seemed to get an idea. "Well, I'm gonna go up to my room. I've got a lot of studying to catch up on," she said nervously, before hurrying up the stairs.

The trio didn't think much of it. Jazz was a good big sister, but in a team with a kick-butt goth chick with anger issues, a wimpy techno-geek with a crush on his PDA, and a clumsy kid with ghost powers, she was definitely the weirdest in the group.

* * *

 **AN: Hey everybody! Hope you like this chapter. I finally got one done that's a little longer. Next one's long too! Yay!**

 **I want to send a special thanks to my friends, hrisi292 & Imagination Writer 247, for inspiring me when I had writer's block, (and when this fic was doomed to being two chapters and a paragraph long), as well as everyone else who's reviewed my fics so far. Thank you guys, so much :)**

 **As always, hope you enjoyed, and God bless :) - Ellie**


	4. Chapter 4: Panic

**Chapter 4:**

 **Panic**

* * *

It was around nine o'clock in Amity Park, Illinois. The Trio had gone through twenty-three cures, (nearly all of which involved controlling your breathing,) and had no clue where Danny's parents were. Which only made them more nervous.

Tucker had given up on trying the cures in order after all the breathing exercises caused Danny to hyperventilate. He was lying sideways across Danny's bed, head tilted back over the edge, looking through the list of 'cures' for anything that sounded promising. Sam was in the hall, calling her grandmother for old family remedies. Danny, meanwhile, was pacing his bedroom ceiling.

 ***Hiccup* (Fenton)**

And, then, he wasn't.

"Dude," Tucker said, without looking up. "Stay on the floor, and you'll stop falling."

"I can't help it! It's like I can't stay on the ground. And, now, I can't get _off_ the ground!" Danny half-panicked, hopping up and down and flailing his arms around wildly. Tucker could see this was taking its toll on the halfa.

"Okay, bro. Let's just calm down," Tucker said in an uncharacteristically-soothing way, easing his friend into his computer chair. Had it been any other time, Danny would have suspected a prank in the works. But, at the moment, he was too frazzled to do much. That is, until they heard Danny's parents come in, punctuated by the slam of the front door, just as Sam was coming back into the room.

The female trio-member hurriedly shut the door, leaning back against it, watching in horror as Danny's half-panic became a full-panic. The boy was as pale as a - well, you know - and he started whisper-screaming his thoughts as they raced through his mind. "They're home. They're here. What're we gonna-"

 ***Hiccup* (Phantom)**

"-do? They'll see me. They'll find out. They'll dissect m-"

 ***Hiccup* (Fenton)**

"They're home. They're here. We're gonna FIX it. They **WON'T** see you. They **_WON'T_** find out. **THEY** ** _LOVE_** **YOU**." Sam assured, backing the ghost-boy up further with each rebuttal, until he was sitting in his chair again. He was still pale and trembling, but somewhat calmer. Then, they heard Danny's father on the stairs.

"DANNY-BOY!"

 ***Hiccup* (Phantom)**

"COME LET ME TELL YOU ALL ABOUT THE GHOST YOUR MOTHER AND I FOUGHT-" The big man stopped short in the doorway of his son's room, when he saw the lump in the bed. He paused while it sunk in, watching his sleeping child. He looked toward the bathroom, hearing a noise coming from inside, followed by a slightly quieter noise. He almost went to check, but figured it was just that leaky faucet he'd been meaning to fix. Oh, well. It could wait. No use waking Danny-Boy.

"Aww, I'll... tell you about it, tomorrow. G'night, Danny-Boy." And, more quietly than anyone who'd ever seen the man would think possible, Jack Fenton shut the door and slipped back downstairs.

* * *

Danny had still been panicking when Sam shoved a pair of pajamas into his chest and pushed him, backwards, into the bathroom, mid-hiccup. Danny's back-end hit the floor, just as the door shut in his face. She shoved Tucker into the closet, emitting a muffled yelp from the techno-geek, and hopped into Danny's bed. She pulled the blankets up over her head, hearing Danny's panicked clamoring die down, just as Mr. Fenton barged in.

The big man stopped short. Danny's rampant hiccupping could be heard from where Sam lay, and she shifted the blankets slightly to peek at the bathroom door. A flicker could be seen below the door, from what she assumed was Danny's involuntary transformations, before it stopped. The hiccupping could still be heard, but Danny must've done something to hide the flash.

There was a sudden thud, and Sam risked a stealthy glance at Mr. Fenton, who seemed to be listening for something. She fervently hoped he didn't hear Danny. After what seemed like an eternity, the big man whispered something (more quietly than she had thought he was capable of,) and slipped out.

Sam sighed in relief, sitting up as tucker half-fell, half-stumbled out of the closet. They opened the bathroom door to tell Danny it was safe to come out. Flipping the lights on, they found the room a wreck. The hamper was tipped over, clothes and towels were everywhere, (some of which were shoved against the crack under the door,) soap and shampoo were spilled and/or splattered on the floor and walls, and a leg hung over the edge of the bathtub, an empty shampoo bottle against the wall directly opposite.

Danny Fenton was contorted in the bottom of the tub, looking like he'd fallen there, softly hiccupping - and transforming - in his sleep. He was wearing mismatched pajamas, and they weren't the ones Sam had handed him. Looking around, she spotted the clean ones among those shoved under the door. She guessed he had grabbed some dirty ones by mistake, in the dark.

After looking him over, making sure he really was asleep and not knocked unconscious, the two set to work. Tucker sat down at Danny's computer to continue his research, and build a more comprehensive list, (one he could add to,) while Sam crept down the hall to get Jazz.

It was gonna be a long night for Team Phantom. Good thing it was Friday.

* * *

 **A/N: Longer chapter! Yay! This is probably going to be the normal size for chapters.**

 **Next week, we hear Danny's side of this incident, and learn about a new problem *Evil grin***

 **As always, hope you enjoyed, and God bless :) - Ellie**


	5. Chapter 5: Another Little Problem

**Chapter 5:**

 **Another Little Problem**

* * *

After Sam and Jazz had, literally, dropped the sleeping ghost-boy back into bed, (seriously, he sleeps like a rock,) the three remaining members of Team Phantom had stayed up into the wee hours of the morning, marking out their strategy.

Tucker had come up with a long list of cures, sorted by type, so they could lay off the breathing exercises for a while. Some of them had actually made Danny's hiccups _worse_.

* * *

Danny woke up exhausted - as Phantom. He glanced wildly around the room, searching for eyes - and weapons - that wouldn't take kindly to finding the wrong Danny in his bed. Thankfully, the door was shut, and the house was quiet. He found the other members of Team phantom scattered around his room, sound asleep.

Tucker was leaned half-across Danny's computer desk, a puddle of drool forming next to him. Sam was in the floor, her phone on her chest, seeming to have fallen asleep while using it. Jazz had pulled one of her own chairs into the room. She was leaned back in it, head tilted to the side, hugging some book called "Psychological Cures for Physical Maladies".

Danny looked at the clock, and realized his mother would be calling him down for breakfast soon, unless she was down in the lab and forgot. He tried to transform back into Fenton, but the rings didn't appear. He tried again. Nada.

He really hoped his mom was in the lab.

He went into his bathroom, watching his reflection as he tried to coax the transformation rings out of his core, longing more than he ever had for the strange, warm-yet-chilly, tingling sensation to wash over him. But it didn't come.

He started to panic. Had something happened. He remembered slipping on a bottle of shampoo the night before. It hadn't knocked him out, he was just too tired and too afraid of making more noise to untangle himself with his Dad just outside the door. Hiccuping more than ever, he had closed his eyes, listening for his father, trying to calm himself, and praying that his dad didn't open the door... And, then, he had woken up in bed.

The others must've carried him there sometime last night, then set to work on a battle plan against the hiccup scourge. But, why couldn't he change back? He wasn't... "I didn't... d-... die the rest of the way... did I?" He half-whispered to his reflection, more calmly than he really should have been. He stared himself down, intently, for several long moments.

 ***Hiccup* (Fenton)**

"Nope. We're good." He said, in a deceptively bored tone, releasing a breath he hadn't realized he was holding. Tucker stirred, looking like his head might fall off the desk. Danny tried to get him into the bed, (making them more comfortable was the least he could do for his incredible friends,) but his super-strength wasn't carrying over into his human-form like it had been gradually doing.

He tried to transform again, testing it out in human-form. Nope. He whispered his battle-cry out loud, careful not to alert his parent or wake his friends. Still nothing. He settled for getting Tucker and Sam some pillows. Jazz was fine. She slept like that all the time.

He crept to the empty section of his room and tested some of his other powers out.

Invisibility: nope.

Intangibility: nope.

Flight: nope. He was still sore from yesterday.

Ice powers: nope, nope, nada.

Dream invasion: he tried in on Tucker. Ouch. No. Danny rubbed his head, while Tucker mumbled something about meat and snuggled deeper into his pillow. Sam mumbled something about veggies and threw her pillow at him.

 ***Hiccup* (Phantom)**

The pillow hit Danny instead. He tried his powers again. Check, check, check, and check. Everything worked. Though, he decided against testing his dream invasion powers again. It had occured to him that he might hiccup and get stuck... Well, at least he could see where his parents were, now.

* * *

 **AN: Hey, everybody! :) Thirty-six followers? I can't believe it! Thank you, so much! :D It's currently 2:23 AM, and I'm still awake, so I thought I'd go ahead and post this, for all my fellow sleepless fanfictioners :)**

 **So, Danny is losing more control of his powers than he thought. *Slightly-evil giggle* I think I said this in the beginning somewhere, but I have absolutely no idea how long this fic will end up being. I've already written eleven chapters, and I have no clue where I'll go from here. It might become a revelation fic, but it probably won't be. I know how I want it to end, but it could happen in chapter twelve, or it could wind up chapter twenty-three, for all I know.**

 **Also, I know my chapters are short, but this seems to be my default size... hehe. It just doesn't seem to flow right, otherwise. Once the fic is finished, I might go back and combine, but I probably won't.**

 **Wow. I think this is the longest author's note I've ever written. I'm gonna catch some Z's, before I can blabber any longer.**

 **Anywho, please review :) And, as always, God bless, and I hope you enjoy :) - Ellie**


	6. Chapter 6: Strange Happenings

**Chapter 6:**

 **Strange Happenings**

* * *

Danny crept, invisibly, down the hall. He glanced into his parents room and bathroom, then headed down the stairs and to the kitchen. Finding no one, he went to the middle of the living room, directly above his parents' lab. He got down on the floor and stuck his head through intangibly. His parents were down there, alright. He paused, eavesdropping on their conversation. (Hey, ya never knew.) Apparently, their newest weapon would be a doozy for the 'Phantom scum'.

His dad was enthusing to his mom about how the 'Fenton BOO-ger' (which looked like a giant, metal, green and silver nose,) would make ghosts sick. At the name of the machine, Danny couldn't help but snicker. "BOO-ger?" He whispered to himself, incredulously, his voice rising an octave or two.

According to his dad, the ghosts would have to stop terrorizing the town, because they wouldn't have the strength to do more than eat chicken soup. Or, that would be the case if ghosts ate, that is.

Little did Jack know, ghosts did, in fact, eat. They just ate ectoplasmic food, instead of human food. Halfas ate both. Which is why, as disturbing and dangerous as his mom's ectoplasm-contaminated cooking was, it was actually _good_ for him, since it covered all the bases.

As long as he ate _it_ , before it ate _him_.

 ***Hiccup* (Fenton)**

"Oh, no." Danny said, freezing in panic.

"ALRIGHT, MADS, LET'S GO TEST THIS BABY OUT!" How they hadn't heard him, he would never know.

 _Oh, no. Oh, no._ "No, no, no, no, no, no-" Danny whispered to himself, pulling at his now-tangible head, which was stuck inside the floor. He watched in horror, pulling harder, as his parents headed up the stairs.

"Okay, Fenton," he whispered to himself, still pulling frantically. "Keep your head on, hehe. Maybe they'll use the back door?"

No such luck. Danny's dad bounded up the stairs, his wife hurrying along behind him. "But, Jack, I haven't even fixed the kids breakfast ye- ...Danny!?" Maddie's mouth hung open at the sight of her youngest child.

"Uhh... hi, Mom."

"What, _on earth_ , happened!?"

"Uuum... a ghost did it?" It came out as more of a question than an answer.

"A GHOST!? NO SPOOKY SPECTER MESSES WITH _MY_ BOY! QUICKLY, SON! WHICH WAY DID HE GO!?"

"Uhhh,... that way?" Again, more question than answer. Danny pointed in the direction he _hoped_ was the front door, but was actually the umbrella leaned next to it.

Jack gasped. "HURRY, MADS. DON'T WORRY, DANNY-BOY! WE'LL GET THAT MONSTROUS MOUND OF ECTOPLASMIC FILTH, AND PUMMEL IT INTO GLOWING, GREEN PASTE, UNTIL IT AGREES TO GET YOU OUT OF THERE!"

The big man ran out the door, nearly taking it off its hinges (again), and down the street, guns ablazing. Maddie was just glad he hadn't taken out the wall behind the umbrella. She turned to hers son - er - to the bottom half of her son. "Don't worry, Sweetie. We'll get you out of there if we have to beat that ghost into the next millennium!"

On that, Danny didn't doubt her. His parents really _did_ love him. They would love his other half, too, if they knew it was him behind the mask - er - ghost - er - ...whatever.

Maddie Fenton ran out the door behind her husband. Why _had_ he been so frantic last night.

 ***Hiccup* (Phantom)**

Oh, yeah. That.

Danny pulled himself out of the floor, just in time to see Sam, Jazz, and Tucker at the top of the stairs. Sam leaned back against the wall, while Jazz leaned against the railing, both holding in their laughter. Barely. Tucker was on the floor, already laughing so hard no sound was coming out.

All of a sudden, Tucker found his voice. "Ahhh!" He shouted in mock-horror. "Ghost-Ostrich!"

They lost it.

* * *

 **AN: Hey, everybody! :) This chapter** ** _may_** **be a little OOC for the Fenton parents, but I needed to get them out of the house, while remaining oblivious. Plus, I figured Danny's luck had been too good for too long, for someone that clumsy. Poor Danny... :)**

 **RevyCaitEll: That's okay :) Sorry you had trouble signing in :( I hope you get it figured out. Thank you, so much! I'm so glad you like it :)**

 **Anywho, as always, hope you enjoyed, and God bless :)**

 **\- Ellie**


	7. Chapter 7: Of Hiccups & Fish

**Chapter 7:**

 **Of Hiccups & Fish**

* * *

"You are not a fish." Danny Phantom said to his reflection in the bathroom mirror, growing steadily more annoyed.

 ***Hiccup* (Fenton)**

"You are _not_ a fish."

 ***Hiccup* (Phantom)**

" **You are not a** ** _fish_** **!** "

 ***Hiccup* (Fenton)**

" ** _YOU_** **ARE NOT A FISH!** "

 ***Hiccup* (Phantom)**

"I don't think this is working," Sam deadpanned, sitting on the edge of Danny's bed.

"That's a ' _no_ ' for Cure #36." Tucker said, crossing it off on the list.

"There has _got_ to be a better way to go about this." Jazz said from her chair, propping her head in her hand.

Danny had explained the short in his powers once his friends and sister had stopped laughing, and Jazz had dozed off again while they were discussing which cure they should try next. She had then been rudely awakened by what she could've sworn was her baby brother's mental breakdown in the bathroom mirror. Needless to say, she wasn't happy.

"I know! We've tried..." Danny trailed off, counting on his fingers, before giving up. "How many cures?"

"Twenty-four." Sam supplied, laying back across Danny's bed, a pillow covering her eyes to block out the massive headache she felt coming on.

"Twenty-four cures, and none of it's working!" Danny floated over to his bed, unable to touch to floor without a great deal of effort. Sam winced at the outburst.

 ***Hiccup* (Fenton)**

Then, he plopped down next to Sam. The goth girl winced again, pressing the pillow harder over her face. "Try saying 'pineapple'." Tucker put in, without looking up.

Danny sighed. "Pineapple." The four teens waited. Thirty seconds passed.

"Pineapple." Danny repeated, more hopefully. Sam sat up.

"Pineapple." He said louder. Tucker put his PDA down, suddenly on the edge of his seat.

"Pineapple!" Still nothing. Jazz dropped the book she was holding.

" _Pineapple!_ _ **Pineapple!**_ _ **Pineapple!**_ " Danny shouted.

"Pineapple!" Jazz shouted, jumping up from her seat."

"Pineapple!" Sam and Tucker followed her lead.

Could it be? No hiccups! The members of Team Phantom jumped and danced around the room, shouting their new favorite word. "Pineapple! Pineapple! Pineapple! I LOVE PINEAPP-

 ***Hiccup* (Phantom)**

The celebration ended, abruptly. "Nevermind," Danny said, dejectedly, stuck in the air from his last joyful leap.

"There goes #182." Tucker said, crossing it off, seeming disgusted with it.

"I vote we make 182 Team Phantom's official _un_ lucky number." Sam groaned.

"Agreed." The other three chorused, sadly. They sounded like dying sheep.

Tucker sighed. "Let's go back to the breathing exercises." Danny made an undignified noise.

* * *

 **AN: Hey, everybody! :) I know this chapter's a little on the short side, but the next couple should (hopefully) make up for it :)**

 **Poor Danny, He's never gonna get over this. It's a good thing it's only Saturday :)**

 **Thank you guys so much for your reviews :) Without them, I probably would've given up on this fic ages ago :)**

 **Next week, we find out what Jazz is planning *evil grin***

 **As always, God bless, and I hope you enjoyed :)**

 **\- Ellie**


	8. Chapter 8: Jazz's Plan

**Chapter 8:**

 **Jazz's Plan**

* * *

"Okay, breathe in through your nose, hold your breath, swallow three times, then let it out through your nose again." Tucker instructed a still-frazzled Danny.

"Tucker," the halfa whined. "I really, really, _really_ _hate_ breathing exerci-"

" _Just_ _ **do it**_ _, already_." Sam snapped, cutting him off. The halfa took a deep breath and did as he was told.

 ***Inhale* *Swallow* *Swallow* *Swallow* *Exhale***

 ***Burp* *Hiccup* (Phantom)**

Tucker cackled, while Sam scowled and fanned the smell away. Jazz had gone back to her room about an hour (and sixteen cures) before, with an odd explanation and a nervous expression. Danny still didn't think much of it. In a family with a fudge-loving giant, a woman who could bring food to life, (by _accident_ , no less,) and a half-ghost kid, Jazz was _still_ the weird one.

Tucker crossed another cure off the list, mumbling something about "#247" under his breath.

"Okay, that's the last of the breathing exercise-"

" **YES!** " Danny cut him off, jumping (as much as you can when you're floating) higher into the air and striking a victorious pose.

"Now, on to the next cure." Tucker said.

"Awww." Danny whined, dropping his arms and slumping.

"Cure #144: Get scared/surprised."

" _Scared_? I'm a _ghost_. And-"

 ***Hiccup* (Fenton)**

He dropped to the floor. "-how am I gonna get surprised, if I _know_ -"

"BOOGA, BOOGA, BOOGA!" Jazz screamed, jumping out of Danny's closet, wearing a combination of Sam and Tucker's vampiress and robot costumes (respectively), from last Halloween. In her excitement, she jumped a little too far, nearly bumping into her brother.

"Ahhhh!" Danny screamed, stumbling backwards and tripping over a pillow someone ( _Sam_ ) had left in the floor. He fell halfway onto his bed, with his head in the floor and one foot where his pillow used to be.

"Did it work?" Jazz asked obliviously, pulling off the now-fanged robot head. It actually looked pretty cool that way, though Sam would still never be caught dead in it. Robots were so mainstream.

 ***Hiccup* (Phantom)**

"Nope." Tucker supplied, unnecessarily, trying to stifle his giggles. "She's been planing that since yesterday afternoon, y'know." He added, smirking over at the annoyed half-ghost in the floor.

"B-but- How'd she get in here!?" Danny asked, frazzled yet again.

"Stuck her in the closet, while you were meditating with Sam."

* * *

Two hours earlier...

* * *

"Alright, Danny," Sam said, sitting cross-legged in her friend's bedroom floor. At her prompting, Danny sat down across from her, his back to the door. "Just relax. Close your eyes, and breathe deeply." Tucker was standing behind the halfa, hiding a laugh with one hand.

Danny did as he was told. His eyes closed, his shoulders slumped, he allowed his mind to relax.

 ***Hiccup* (Phantom)**

Then, he had to start all over, hovering just above the floor. Meanwhile, he failed to notice Jazz creeping along behind him, she and Tucker startling and freezing when he hiccuped. Danny and Sam were just getting started, and Tucker was holding back his laughter harder than before, when Jazz was shut inside her brother's closet.

* * *

Present moment...

* * *

"I-"

 ***Hiccup* (Fenton)**

"-hate this, _so much_." Danny grumbled. Tucker had gotten a little too much enjoyment out of _that_ cure.

* * *

 **AN: Hey, everybody! :)**

 **So, yep.** ** _That's_** **the big plan Jazz had. It's not too creative, but it seems very** ** _Jazz_** **, I think :)**

 **Special thanks to KnightOwl247 for** **Cure #247: Breathe in through your nose, hold your breath, swallow three times, then let it out through your nose again.**

 **To the guest/guests who've been commenting: Thank you, so much! I'm so glad you like it!** **Mmmmm... *singsong* You'll have to wait n' see... I know, there really aren't :) Thank you, so much! :)**

 **RevyCaitEll: I'm still not getting the option to reply to you, but thank you, so much! :)) I practically cracked up writing those parts ;)**

 **Next chapter is** **Cure Montage #1!** **(This should be fun *evil giggle*)**

 **As always, God bless, and I hope you enjoyed :)**

 **\- Ellie**


	9. Chapter 9: Cure Montage 1

**Chapter 9:**

 **CURE MONTAGE #1**

* * *

 **Cure #243:**  
 **Blow on your thumb, like you're blowing up a balloon**

* * *

Danny put his thumb in his mouth and blew, like his half-life depended on it. Which, judging by the current train of events, it just might.

"I AM THE BOX GHOST!" Said ghost screamed, phasing through Danny's bedroom wall.

 ***Hiccup* (Fenton)**

Danny bit his thumb in his surprise. "Ahhh!" He screamed, somewhat girlishly.

"Dude, did you just hiccup?" The confused ghost asked.

It didn't matter that his powers were malfunctioning. Danny's eyes glowed an angry green. Boxy did _not_ know who he was messing with, today.

* * *

 **Cure #42:**  
 **Try to shout "now", just before your next hiccup**

* * *

"Now!" Danny shouted. Unfortunately, he was a few seconds off.

 ***Hiccup* (Fenton)**

"You missed." Tucker pointed out, unnecessarily.

"Ya _think_?" Danny replied, annoyed. "NOW!"

 ***Hiccup* (Phantom)**

"Shoot."

* * *

 **Cure #76:**  
 **Chew gum**

* * *

Tucker handed a piece of bubble gum to Danny, who popped it into his mouth and began to chew. After a few seconds, he decided to try for a bubble.

"BOOGA, BOOGA, BOOGA!"

Jazz was really determined to make her idea work...

Danny screamed and hiccuped at the same time. (Tucker was impressed with that one.) Danny's bubble popped, covering all of Team Phantom in gum. The Trio sent glares at the redhead, who chuckled nervously.

* * *

 **Cure #37:**  
 **Eat a spoonful of sugar, then focus on some other activity.**  
 **(Might take a minute or two.)**

* * *

Danny sat next to Tucker in his bedroom floor, both holding game controllers. The Trio had managed to get _some_ of the gum out of their hair. But, not enough, apparently, as it had all of their hair sticking out in every direction. Sam handed the half-ghost a spoonful of sugar, and he ate it, almost angrily.

"You are GOIN' DO-"

 ***Hiccup* (Phantom)**

"OWN!" He declared, around the mouthful, now floating just above the floor. Whether he was talking to his best friend or the hiccups is anyone's guess. If he was gonna get his mind off this, he was gonna have to work hard.

Alas, it seems neither the hiccups nor the smug grin on Tucker's face were going _anywhere_ , as Danny discovered. Apparently, hiccups make it hard to fight, in games _or_ reality.

Halfway through their fourth virtual battle, (Danny losing miserably,) Technus decided to stick his head through the screen. Danny almost lost it when the ghost-geek shouted "Booga, booga, booga!"

Jazz walked in from her second shower, after what she had dubbed 'The Chicle Debacle', screamed, and sucked both Technus _and_ Danny into the thermos. Again.

 _Well, at least I'm not in here with_ _The Box Ghost_ _, this time,_ He thought.

 ***Hiccup* (Fenton)**

Technus burst out laughing, as Danny's hiccups got worse. The three humans in the room couldn't help but stare at the cackling soup thermos, which hopped a little with each hiccup.

* * *

 **Cure #92:**  
 **Hold your tongue outside of your mouth**

* * *

"Thith ith thtupid." Danny deadpanned, holding his tongue with two fingers. He was standing in the middle of the Fentons' living room with the rest of his team. With his free hand, he picked at a small wad of gum he had just found behind his ear. (Oh, Technus was gonna be paying for this, for a _loooong_ time.)

Suddenly, Ember flew into the house. The Box Ghost was spreading rumors all over the Zone that the halfa had the hiccups, and it was a sight to see. She couldn't just _not_ check it out and/or torment him.

After Danny bit his tongue, Tucker swallowed the piece of gum he'd taken for himself, Jazz's hair got stuck to Sam's ( _again_ ), and Ember laughed so hard she actually _cried_ , the young ghost-hunters decided to exact their revenge.

Strange things happened in FentonWorks, that hour.

Let's just say it involved bubblegum, peanut butter, a rake, a fire extinguisher, a soup thermos, and a _lot_ of hiccuping. (Not to mention the frozen moment when Danny's dad ran through the middle of the improvised battlefield to grab some fudge from the kitchen, completely oblivious to the ongoing, mid-air war he had inadvertently paused. Thankfully, he seemed to have forgotten that Danny should be stuck in the floor.)

Strange things... anywhere else. Sadly, it was pretty-much normal around here.

* * *

 **AN: Hey, Everybody! :) Happy Friday!**

 **Well, here it is! The chapter that is basically what I thought this whole fic would basically be, when I first started writing it! And, after I got started, it took me** ** _nine chapters_** **to get here... And, there's only one more like it! But, oh, well :)**

 **The good new is, the rest of the chapters, from here on out, should be longer than they have been :) (Except Chapter 13... Not sure what happened there...)**

 **Special thanks to scaehime for** **Cure #37: Eat a spoonful of sugar, then focus on some other activity** **.**

 **As always, God bless, and I hope you enjoyed :)**

 **\- Ellie**


	10. Chapter 10: To The Lab!

**Chapter 10:**  
 **To The Lab!**

* * *

Tucker checked his PDA again. "Cure #25: Scream for as long as you can."

"Now, _this_ I can do." Danny said, confidently. "I've felt like screami-"

 ***Hiccup* (Phantom)**

"-ing for _two days_ , now."

"What for?" His sister asked, distracted with the pieces of gum she was still picking out of her hair. The Trio just stared at her a moment. She didn't pick up on it, and didn't even seem to realize she'd said it out loud, so they let it slide.

Getting back on track, Danny took a deep breath, prepared himself, opened his mouth, and -

"Wait!"

\- was interrupted by Sam.

"Don't you think we should do this _in the lab_?" The two boys looked at her, blinking.

"Y'know, the room that's sound-proof, and, partially, _ghost-proof_?" More blinking. "Just in case your anxiety transforms it from a _scream_ to a _wail_." She emphasized.

"Oh." Danny realized. The half-ghost's hand made its way, instinctively, to the back of his neck, as it always did. Casper high had a poll running on whether Danny was even aware of his (adorable) habit.

A hundred and fourteen of two hundred and three were betting he wasn't.

The Trio headed down to the lab, leaving Jazz to tend to her hair. Tucker and Sam found safety behind some ghost-proof barriers (just in case,) and Danny tried again.

Fortunately, the scream _didn't_ turn into a wail. _Un_ fortunately, his scream was interrupted by his ghost sense.

Then, by another hiccup.

And, then, by Skulker.

Apparently, even with it peanut-buttered and bubble-gummed shut, Ember's mouth could _still_ run...

* * *

By the end of the day, Team Phantom was exhausted. They'd tried twenty-two more cures and chased off a whole horde's worth of ghosts, including Skulker, Youngblood, Klemper, and The Box Ghost (eight more times). Then, Dora had stopped by for something, though she never did tell them _what_ , because she was too busy trying to hide the fact that she found the Trio's entire situation _hilarious_.

Now, Cujo was running around under Danny's feet, yipping like crazy, and Tucker was on the floor laughing, again. Danny had said something about being fed up with all the noise and chaos, and Jazz had pointed out that Cujo was probably acting like this because Danny sounded a bit like a squeaky toy.

The halfa was not at all happy with _that_ connection.

Leaving the techno geek to his (probably stress- and sleep-deprivation-induced) hysteria, Sam picked up his PDA and picked out another cure. She was determined to try, at least, _one more_ cure, before she had to go home.

She didn't _want_ to leave Danny while this was going on, but too much rebellion and her parents would ban her from hanging out with Danny at all. (She would still sneak out to be with him, anyway, but she had enough things to hide, and she didn't need any more invisible balls to juggle.) Besides, Jazz and Tucker would both be here, and she really _did_ need to get some sleep. And, a shower.

"#152:" She read off. "Pluck a hair out of your ear?" She finished, confused, then shrugged. "Sounds easy enough."

"Actually, I think I've heard of that one." Jazz piped up.

Danny was laying in the floor, seeming to have collapsed there, hiccuping every few seconds, in a floating/falling cycle, as the puppy on his chest licked his face. "I'll try anything, at this point," He groaned, sitting up.

Jazz went upstairs to find a pair of tweezers, and Cujo decided nipping Danny's toes would make him squeak more. Oh, he squeaked, alright...

After tossing the puppy back into the Ghost Zone, somewhat reluctantly, (he really _was_ just a puppy,) Danny headed back up to the den, where his friends waited.

Jazz leaned in with the tweezers, careful not to poke Danny's ear or eardrum with them. "Just hold still a minute..." She said, fiddling around with the tool.

 ***Pluck***

"Ouch!"

 ***Hiccup* (Phantom)**

* * *

 **AN: Hey, everybody! This one's short, I know. Next chapter is just a** ** _teensy_** **bit shorter than this one, but the rest are longer. We're almost at the end :)**

 **Special thanks to speedyowl152 for** **Cure #152: Pluck a hair out of your ear** **.**

 **Also, I realized last week that, even though when I add a chapter to the doc manager, It comes up the way I have it formatted in my computer, it changes after I save, so I'm going through and fixing it.** **But, it's nothing major. Mostly just hiccup lines and chapter headers (Which I am now adding titles to) :)** **Tell me if you love it. Tell me if you hate it. Tell me if I'm a weirdo and need to end this author's note, already.**

 **As always, I hope your enjoyed, and God bless**

 **\- Ellie**


	11. Chapter 11: Confidence

**Chapter 11:**  
 **Confidence**

* * *

Two seconds after Danny hiccuped, his parents burst through the back door. Thankfully, the surprise seemed to have coaxed another hiccup out of him, and Danny _Fenton_ stood where his parents' most-hated enemy once had.

"I'M A-COMIN', DANNY-BOY!" Jack bellowed, running into the room. In his right hand, he clutched an ectopus. His wife ran in behind him, immediately noticing that their son was no longer in the floor. The boy's father was less attentive.

"DON'T WORRY, DAN-O! WE'LL MAKE THIS PUTRID PIECE OF PROTOPLASM SET YOU FREE, EVEN IF WE HAVE TO RIP IT APART, MOLECULE BY MOLECULE!"

"Jack, dear. It seems Danny's _already_ found a way out of the floor."

Danny froze, trying to come up with an explanation. But, for some reason, the only thing his brain could process was the fact that his parents had _actually_ manged to catch a ghost that was bigger than their toaster. Thankfully, his friends had already thought this through.

Jack looked around, taking in the scene for the first time, and deflated. "AWWW. BUT, I WANTED TO BE THE HERO." Suddenly, Team Phantom felt a little guilty.

"Y-you are!" Sam said hesitantly, thinking on her feet.

"Huh?" Tucker got an elbow for his question. Jazz had said it at the same time, and he wondered why she hadn't gotten the same treatment. But, with one meaningful look, he caught onto Sam's script-change.

"I mean, yeah." He started, slowly, rewriting the pre-prepared answers in his head. "I managed to use one of your inventions to turn the floor intangible, so Danny could get out," he finished, slightly more confident. (And, maybe a bit smug.)

"Really?" Maddie asked, surprised. "How did you manage _that_?"

"It was an accident, really. Tucker bumped it off of the table, and it just kinda happened." Sam pointed to one of Jack's unfinished inventions, sitting on the coffee table. "You're a hero, Mr. Fenton." She smiled. Jazz and Tucker joined in, Danny was still in his own world. Sam elbowed him. "A hero. Your dad's a hero." She emphasized, through gritted teeth.

"Uh. Yeah, Dad. Absolutely." The blue-eyed boy said, looking up at the big man.

Jack Fenton smiled, pulling the four kids into a bear-hug. "AWW. IT WAS NOTHIN'. I'LL HAVE TO FIGURE OUT HOW THAT HAPPENED, THOUGH. THAT'S NOT EVEN _CLOSE_ TO WHAT IT'S SUPPOSED TO DO."

"What's it _supposed_ to do?" Tucker asked, immediately regretting it. Apparently, it was _another_ inter-dimensional portal, and Tucker was suddenly nervous about standing this close, remembering how the last one turned out. He tried to inch away, but Danny's dad pulled him over to blather on about it, some more.

Maddie had looked skeptical, until she saw her husband's smile. Oh, well. She and Jack would just have to work out how the machine had gotten Danny out, later. It was nice to see the man so proud. She let him go on for about ten minutes, before reminding him of the ectopus still in his grip. He started, looking at the floating, green creature drooping in his hand. Apparently, he had bored it to sleep, though the 'bored' part didn't register with him.

Jack was suddenly very excited. "A NEW INVENTION _AND_ A CAPTURE! IN _ONE DAY_!? OH, I CAN'T WAIT TO TEST OUT MY NEW GADGETS! TO THE LAB, MADS!" He shouted, waking the (very confused) ectopus.

 _Was that ghost's nose running?_ Danny wondered, absently. _Wait, do ectopuses even_ _have_ _noses?_ He shook his head, dislodging the thought. He was probably better off _not_ knowing.

He watched, as his father ran off towards the basement-lab, tugging the ghost along behind him, by its tentacles. The big man looked like a hyperactive five-year-old with a balloon.

A _giant_ , hyperactive five-year-old, with a glowing, green, _semi-sentient_ balloon.

Danny smiled, watching his mom follow along behind him, now just as excited. Whatever just happened, he could worry about it later. Of all the times he'd had to lie to his parents, at least he hadn't had to today.

Whether he was being blasted by ghosts, sucked into a thermos, crushed by a bear-hug the size of Montana, or trying to get his head unstuck from the floorboards, his dad really was his hero.

 ***Hiccup* (Phantom)**

This would all work out, somehow. He just knew it.

* * *

 **AN: Hey, everybody! :)**

 **This one might be a _teensy_ bit shorter, but they're all longer, from here on out :)**

 **To the guest who commented: LOL XD Thanks, I was really trying to make it sound like him :) Jack's one of my favorite characters, partly** ** _because_** **of his inventions' names :) Sounds an awful lot like my Dad, actually XD**

 **As always,**

 **God bless, and I hope you enjoyed :)**

 **\- Ellie**


	12. Chapter 12: Cure Montage 2

**Chapter 12:**  
 **CURE MONTAGE #2**

* * *

 **Cure #24:**  
 **Drink a glass of water through a paper towel**

* * *

Danny and Tucker were in the Fenton's basement/lab again. Sam had gone home, the Fenton parents had gone to bed, and the kids were afraid that Danny's hiccups would wake them up. It was already Saturday night, and they were pushing their time-limit, along with their luck.

Jazz crept down the stairs with a glass of water and a paper towel. trying to ignore the caged ectopus that was _staring_ at her. She handed the items to Danny, who placed the paper towel over top of the glass, and started to drink through it.

 ***Yip* *Yip* *Yip***

Well, looks like Cujo found his way back... Danny sucked in a breath, and got choked on the paper towel. He finally managed to spit it out again, when Jazz slapped him on the back (harder than necessary). Cujo was yipping and nipping at his feet, now, and Tucker was cackling on the floor, again. The poor techno-geek needed some sleep.

 ***Hiccup* (Fenton)**

"Darn it!"

* * *

 **Cure #39:**  
 **Eat peanut butter & milk**

* * *

Danny took a bite out of his peanut butter sandwich, and a swallow of his ice cold milk. It was _so good_. The kids had been so busy trying to fix this, they'd hardly eaten, and the three took this as a chance to make up for lost meals. But...

 ***Hiccup* (Phantom)**

Danny's milk went everywhere, including up his nose, in his eyes, and all over Tucker's head. Jazz tried to hide her laughter behind her sandwich.

"Darn it!"

* * *

 **Cure #94:**  
 **Induce a cough or sneeze**

* * *

Tucker was enjoying this _way_ too much. That was all there was to it. He was currently coming down the basement stairs, carrying a pepper shaker, and wearing a huge, paranoia-inducing grin. Jazz came down behind him, with their mom's feather-duster. They hadn't told him what this cure was, but he already hated it.

After fifteen minutes of borderline tickle-torture and enough pepper up his nose for Danny to never want to taste the seasoning again, the two _still_ hadn't been able to make him sneeze. He just had that awful, I-feel-a-sneeze-coming-on-but-it-won't-just-come-already feeling. And, he was _still_ hiccuping.

 ***Hiccup* (Phantom)**

 ***Hiccup* (Fenton)**

 **Hiccup* (Phantom)**

"Darn it."

 ***Hiccup* (Fenton)**

* * *

 **Cure #258:**  
 **Do three cartwheels, with a Jolly Rancher in your mouth**

* * *

Hmmm... You'd think a cartwheel would be easy, compared to the stuff Danny did every day...

Upside-down, in the middle of the second cartwheel, his ghost sense went off. He lost his balance, landed flat on his back, swallowed the candy, and decided that Tucker's laughter had become the background noise to his life. He opened his eyes (reluctantly) to find himself directly in front of the Fenton Portal, The Box Ghost peeping his head through, and staring down at him...

 ***Hiccup* (Fenton)**

"Darn it..."

* * *

 **Cure #496:**  
 **Take a hot bath/shower**

* * *

After four cups of coffee each, (seven for Jazz,) the three friends were awake and ready to go. At least, their bodies thought they were. Their brains were still trying to keep up, and Jazz was worried that their common sense had been left in the dust. The biggest effect was on Danny, who Tucker and Jazz were beginning to regret giving that much sugar and caffeine to.

The two remaining members of the Team covered their ears with anything they could find, trying to block out the sound of the half-ghost hyper-singing/hiccuping in the shower. The hiccuping didn't seem to be bothering him, at the moment, though. In fact, he seemed to be using it as a metronome.

All that coffee was having strange effects on the boy.

The three had crept out of the lab and up to Danny's room at around seven, closing the door just moments before they heard Jack Fenton up and rearing to go. Both parents were now in the lab, tinkering away, and Jazz was banging on the bathroom door, for Danny to 'get his ghostly rear-end out of the shower, it's been thirty minutes, already'.

The _very_ hyper ghost-boy came out of the bathroom, moments later, wearing nothing but pajama pants. He began to run in circles around the room, only to hiccup and find himself running in circles on the ceiling.

Jazz and Tucker just watched him, mouths hanging open.

* * *

Sam called Jazz to let her know she was on her way, and the older girl told her to just let herself in. The goth made her way up to her almost-boyfriend's room, and found Jazz and Tucker gaping at the ceiling.

"Hey, guys." She walked toward the center of the room, waving a hand in front of their faces. "Where's Dan-

 ***Hiccup* (Fenton) *Thud***

And, then, a little, blue-eyed ghost landed on her.

"Darn it..." Jazz facepalmed, exasperated. Tucker cracked up, again.

* * *

 **Cure #52:**  
 **Drink any drink, until you can't drink anymore**

* * *

"Isn't this what started this whole mess?" Sam deadpanned, staring at the teenage boys, who were chugging soda, again.

"Wait... Is it?" Jazz asked, lifting her exhausted head from her brother's computer desk to look at the strange contest, then looking over to her goth friend.

Sam watched Tucker chug an entire can in three seconds. "Eeeyep." Sam answered, popping the 'p'. "Pretty sure this is _exactly_ how it started." Danny let out a large belch, only to be outdone by his best friend, and the two boys fell over laughing.

 ***Hiccup* (Phantom)**

The half-ghost kept giggling, now floating upside-down.

"Darn it!" This from Sam. Jazz was asleep. Seven cups of coffee was not enough.

* * *

 **AN: Hey, everybody! :) Last cure montage! Longest chapter ever! Woohoo!** **Next chapter is what I consider the 'beginning of the end'!** **Also,** **I do not own Jolly Ranchers.**

 **Special thanks to my friend, Imagination Writer 247, for** **Cure #24: Drink a glass of water through a paper towel** **.**

 **As always,**

 **God bless, and I hope you enjoyed :)**

 **\- Ellie**


	13. Chapter 13: A Question Of Sanity

**Chapter 13:**  
 **A Question Of Sanity**

* * *

After chasing Danny around for ten minutes, trying to get him to eat kim-chee (Cure #87), Sam and Tucker had given up on the food cures. They'd already forced Danny to eat and/or drink a whole list of things.

Crushed ice (Cure #1592)

Popsicles (Cure #536)

Dill pickles (Cure #38)

Marshmallows (Cure #45)

Lemons (Cure #46)

Honey (Cure #256)

Hard candy (Cure #119)

Tabasco sauce and lemon juice (Cure #120)  
[He had, _literally, breathed **fire**_ ]

Room temperature soda (Cure #150)

Ginger tea with honey (Cure #163)

Pepperoni pizza with honey mustard (Cure #499)  
[That one was, actually, pretty good.]

Tomato juice (Cure #501)

Dry bread (Cure #88)

Mustard (Cure #93)

Sour candy (Cure #601)

White vinegar (Cure #500)  
[Never. Again.]

Potato chips (Cure #998)

Hot soup (Cure #1100)

Pudding (Cure #1284)

Grape Gelatin (Cure #1285)

Dark chocolate (Cure #774)

None of which had helped, at all. And, the still-hyper half-ghost was _not_ about to add kim-chee to the list. Hiccups, or no hiccups.

Now, they were trying the opposite. Sam had slipped some kind of plant (nobody wanted to ask what it was or where she'd gotten it) into the boy's water. Now, he was leaned over a toilet, upchucking a lovely mixture of the list above, and hiccuping more than ever.

* * *

Quite some time later, after Danny's stomach had stopped attacking him, Jazz had woken up, and the coffee the rest of Team Phantom intensely regretted giving the young half-ghost had worn off, (or been thrown up, no one was quite sure which,) Danny had collapsed onto his bed and fallen asleep (still hiccuping). Tucker had followed closely behind, taking Jazz's chair, which was still in Danny's room.

Sam, having, _finally_ , gotten enough sleep to not want to kill anybody, (well, not more than usual,) had stayed up to plan out more cures and keep an eye out for Danny's parents. Jazz joined her. After looking through the list, and seeing only a handful of cures that weren't too similar, Sam had an idea. But, the ghost-boy was _not_ going to like it.

* * *

 ***Pop***

The paper bag Danny had been breathing into burst. (Cure #638) " ** _What!?_** "

 ***Hiccup* (Phantom)**

"Hear us out." Sam said, making calming gestures at the frazzled halfa.

"Sam! Are you-"

 ***Hiccup* (Fenton)**

- _crazy_!?" The spider-loving girl tried to explain her plan, but the sleep-deprived teen was too far gone. He began to pace, as he continued his half-to-himself, half-to-everyone-else rant on just _why_ this was 'The Worst Idea In The History Of Ever'.

 ***Hiccup* (Phantom)**

Tucker looked almost ready to join him, but without the hiccups punctuating every third sentence. "Dude, I gotta go with Danny on this one. I mean... Do you really think that's a good idea? Our luck has held out longer than, like, _ever_ , so far. And, I-"

 ***Hiccup* (Fenton)**

He glanced over at the pacing half-ghost, then turned back to Sam. "-expect it to come crashing down around our ears, _any minute_ , now." He reasoned, his best friend still going in the background.

"That's the _point_ , Tucker." Sam said.

 ***Hiccup* (Phantom)**

"Our luck can't last much longer. And, it will _never_ hold out, if Danny has to go to _school_ , like this." Jazz explained.

"We've got time left." Tucker said, though he sounded like he was trying to convince _himself_.

 ***Hiccup* (Fenton)**

"Tucker," Sam said, grabbing Danny's alarm clock off the nightstand, and pointing to the time. They'd been incredibly fortunate that Danny's parents were busy playing with their new toy, and had hardly left the lab, all day. "It's 11:30 pm, on Sunday. School starts in less than eight hours, and we're no closer to curing Danny's hiccups than we were Friday afternoon."

Sam had gone home hours ago, while Danny and Tucker were still asleep, just to placate her parents. She had eaten dinner and, almost immediately, snuck back out. They were running out of time.

 ***Hiccup* (Phantom)**

"We can call in sick." Tucker tried.

" _All_ of us missing school? At the _same time_? The same three kids who are always running out of class, for no good reason? Yeah. _That's_ not suspicious." Sam snarked.

 ***Hiccup* (Fenton)**

Tucker shrugged. "We could skip. Wouldn't be the first time."

"WHAT!?" Jazz started, dropping the book she'd been rereading (for the fifth time).

Sam waved her off. "We don't skip just to skip. We skip-"

 ***Hiccup* (Phantom)**

-to fight ghosts. Some of which would _destroy_ the school, if we didn't." Jazz calmed, somewhat, but still looked none-too-pleased.

"Well, then, we can call _Danny_ in sick." Tucker pulled them back to the previous conversation.

"And, leave him to deal with this, on his own? Tucker, what if his parents see him!?"

"He could wear a hat, to hide the change."

 ***Hiccup* (Fenton)**

"...A _hat_?" The other two asked, together. Even Danny paused in his ranting, to stare at the techno-geek.

"...And, contacts..."

"Tucker," Sam was getting tired of this.

"We could hide him!"

"He's transforming so much, he looks like a _turn signal_."

 ***Hiccup* (Phantom)**

"We could tell his parents it's because of the machine that got him unstuck from the floor."

"And, have them run _tests_ on him?"

"We'll take him to school with us."

"Yes. Because, the people at school are-"

 ***Hiccup* (Fenton)**

"-going to hear that a child was attacked by ghosts, then left home alone, where he was hurt by one of his already-believed-to-be-crazy parents' inventions, and-"

 ***Hiccup* (Phantom)**

"- _nobody's_ going to call Social Services. Great idea." The sarcasm was palpable.

Tucker paused, thinking. Sam raised an eyebrow at him.

 ***Hiccup* (Fenton)**

By this point, Danny had stopped ranting and walked up next to Jazz, to watch his friends go back and forth. Tucker, finally, found his voice again.

"...Yeah, but... _Vlad_?"

* * *

 **AN: Aren't I evil? ;) A fine fit for a chapter 13 on Friday the 13th, don't you think? :)**

 **So, tell me what you think! Take the poll on my page and leave your guess :) Will Plasmius have the cure, or is it a waste of time?**

 **Special thanks to my friend, scaehime, for** **Cure #638: Breath in and out of a paper bag** **.**

 **To Fluffyearedpuppy: I would've sent you a message, but I didn't get the option to reply. Thank you, so much :)) I definitely will, but it'll be in the sequel :)**


	14. Chapter 14: Desperate

**AN: BEFORE YOU READ THIS, I have to warn you that this chapter came out dismally anti-climactic. But, to be fair, this is one of the first scenes (if not** ** _the_** **first scene) I thought of for this fic, and, if this had been three or four chapters long, as I had originally assumed it was going to be, it would be a much better Vlad confrontation. (Though, the more I think about it, the stupider it seems...)**

 **That said, it** ** _does_** **serve a purpose, as it leads things up to the sequel for me, which in my opinion, is** ** _way_** **better than this fic! And, this is** ** _not_** **the end of Vladdy, as I** ** _will_** **be making up for this monstrosity of a chapter in the sequel. So,** ** _please_** **,** ** _please_** **, forgive me for this, and stick around for the rest of the storyline T_T Pretty please, with little gummy-bats on top?**

 **Anyhow, on with the currently-deteriorating show...**

* * *

 **Chapter 14:**  
 **Desperate**

* * *

It had taken some convincing. ("He may be a monster, but he has powers like yours.") A _lot_ of convincing. ("Do you _really_ think he's managed to go all this time, without getting the hiccups, even _once_?") But, running low on time and ideas, and getting very, _very_ desperate, Team Phantom headed for Vlad's at around 3:30 am, with Danny crouching under a blanket in the floorboards of Jazz's car.

Illegal? Definitely. But, they couldn't risk anyone seeing him transform.

Of course, that was after trying one last cure. #702: Eat chilli and drink milk and honey. It had worked for all of twenty seconds. But, for the following two hours, Danny's hiccups were punctuated by short coughing fits.

* * *

Vlad was in his lab, trying to perfect his latest weapon, without the last needed part. Oh, well. He would simply have to trick young Daniel into retrieving it for him. Of course, he could just go and get it, himself, but where was the fun in that.

 ***Ding-Dong***

All of a sudden, the doorbell sounded, breaking his concentration. He fumbled his machine, nearly dropping it. He thought for a moment. Had he stayed up all night? He hadn't thought he'd been in his lab for more than a few hours.

Sure enough, a glance at the clock on the wall told him that he was correct. He'd been up well into the night, but not far enough into the next day for _visitors_. Who, _one earth_ , was at his door at nearly _four in the morning_? He checked his monitors.

 _Daniel_.

There's really no way to describe the twisted smirk that crawled across Vlad's face at that moment, but, let's just say that Skulker was dead-asleep in his lair, (* _Badum tss_ *) when a sudden chill woke him up.

This was just _too perfect_.

* * *

"Ah, _Daniel_ ," Masters said, opening the door, grinning down sinisterly at the four teens on his doorstep. "Finally realize that your _idiot father_ is no competition for _me_?" He didn't expect the boy to say yes, but he could still hope.

 ***Hiccup* (Phantom)**

Recognition (and a bit of surprise) came over Vlad's features, before he hid them. "Ah. I see you've discovered one of the more... unfortunate... side-effects of our abilities."

Danny muttered something less-than-flattering under his breath. "Just tell me how to-"

 ***Hiccup* (Fenton)**

"-get rid of 'em, Fruitloop."

Vlad folded his arms and leaned against the door frame, grinning smugly. "Well, I suppose I _coul_ -"

 ***Hiccup* (Phantom)**

"-I suppose I _could_ tell you how," He picked back up, as though he hadn't been interrupted. "But, of course, I'd need-"

 ***Hiccup* (Fenton)**

The man blinked, then continued. "-Of course, I'd need _you_ to do somethi-"

 ***Hiccup* (Phantom)**

Vlad's eye twitched. "-I'd need _you_ to-"

 ***Hiccup* (Fenton)**

"-I'dneed _you_ todosomethingfor _me_!" The older half-ghost breathed heavily, as the four kids stared at him. "In return," He finished, straightening his tie, and regaining his composure. Somewhat.

 ***Hiccup* (Phantom)**

Vlad closed his eyes, tightly. "Like what?" Danny asked, suspiciously.

"You see, Daniel, I-"

 ***Hiccup* (Fenton)**

He rubbed at the spot on his forehead, where he could feel a headache blossoming. "I am currently work-"

 ***Hiccup* (Phantom)**

"-I am-"

 ***Hiccup* (Fenton)**

"-working on-"

 ***Hiccup* (Phantom)**

"-...a new project-"

 ***Hiccup* (Fenton)**

The old half-ghost screwed his eyes shut, again.

 ***Hiccup* (Phantom)**

Vlad looked as if he were about to explode and take several counties with him, then he deflated and sighed. He turned around, slowly and calmly, stepped inside his home, and slammed the door.

Team Phantom stood there a moment, staring. "Does that mean he's not gonna tell us?" Tucker wondered aloud.

"I think it means I annoy him," Danny smirked. Desperate or not, driving the Fruitloop up as many walls as possible was a talent the younger half-ghost was truly proud of.

Sam was debating whether to head home and try some more cures, or just have Danny walk her through the door, intangibly, so she could _make_ Vlad tell them. (Though, who knew if Vlad really _knew_ the cure, at all. Who knew if there even _was_ a cure. It was, more than likely, another one of the old Fruitloop's tricks.) Before Sam could decide, though, the door opened, again.

"Here," Vlad said, grabbing one of Danny's hands and shoving something into it. The boy stared at the object for a moment.

 ***Hiccup* (Fenton)**

"...This is a marshmallow." Vlad pinched the bridge of his nose with one hand, the other on the door frame, as though it was the only thing holding him up.

"Yes. It is."

"But-" Vlad held out a hand to stop him.

 ***Hiccup* (Phantom)**

For a moment, looking at the man's scrunched up features, Danny got the sense that Vlad was plotting his murder. Then, the cheese-head calmed down again.

"Go home. Eat that -" he pointed to the marshmallow in Danny's palm. "- while looking at that _ridiculous_ neon sign your _**idiot**_ _father_ decided would look good on the side of your house, and thinking of bald people."

 ***Hiccup* (Fenton)**

"But-" Vlad slammed the door. Three seconds later, the ghost shield came on, knocking Danny backwards off the front steps, and into the bushes.

 ***Hiccup* (Phantom)**

* * *

The four teens stood in front of _FentonWorks_ , staring at the marshmallow in Danny's hand. "I bet it's poisoned."

"Tucker!" The other three shouted.

 ***Hiccup* (Fenton)**

" _Seriously_! It's _Vlad_! Did you _see_ that look he gave you!?"

He had a point.

The four stared at it another few moments, before Jazz perked up. "Wait, right here," She said, before running into the house. The Trio looked after her. She came back a few seconds later, with a bag of marshmallows. "These should work, right?" She asked, popping one into her mouth.

 ***Hiccup* (Phantom)**

"Works for me," Danny replied, tossing the probably-poisoned marshmallow over his shoulder, and reaching for a fresh one. They had to do this fast, it was almost daybreak.

Danny popped the marshmallow into his mouth, and began to chew. He took a step back, craning his neck to better see the neon _FentonWorks_ sign on the side of his house, and trying to think of bald people. (For some reason, no one came to mind, but Mr. Lancer.) The other members of Team Phantom watched, intently.

He chewed.

He swallowed.

They waited.

Two minutes passed. Then three.

Nothing.

" **Yes!** " They all cried, dancing around the deserted sidewalk.

"Huh?" Maddie Fenton asked, leaning out her bedroom window, rubbing the sleep from one eye. Suddenly, she was fully-awake. " **Ghost!** " She shouted, grabbing the nearest ecto-weapon and firing on Danny. "You, get away from those kids, you ectoplasmic manifestation of malicious intentions and post-human consciousness!" In the back of his mind, Danny wondered how she managed to say that in one breath.

The woman hit him, but she must've grabbed the wrong weapon. That one got Danny square in the chest, and just knocked him down. It didn't even hurt, that much. He got up quickly and flew a short distance away, transforming behind a building and heading back home in his human form.

"Where's Danny?" Maddie demanded, looking around, as her husband leaned out the window next to her.

"Uh..." they droned.

"Right here, Mom," Danny piped up, jogging around the corner. "I... uh... tripped... into an alley, and the ghost didn't see me."

"DANNY-BOY!" The big man boomed, waking the neighbors with his normal speaking-voice. "WHAT'RE YOU KIDS DOING OUT THERE, AT THIS HOUR?"

"Uh... We-" Sam started.

"We stayed up all night," Jazz admitted.

" _What!?_ " Her parents asked.

" _What!?_ " The Trio echoed.

"For a science project. We were testing a theory. Sam was right," She reiterated, pointing to the veggie-loving girl. Well, it was half-true.

"TESTING THEORIES!? COOL!" Jack shouted. His wife was less enthusiastic.

"While I would never discourage you kids from scientific discovery, you really shouldn't do things like this, without asking permission," Maddie chided. "Especially, on a school night."

"We're sorry," They chorused, looking downtrodden. It wasn't a hard look to pull off, seeing as they were all exhausted and still had gum in their hair, and there were leaves stuck in Danny's from the bushes at Vlad's.

"Tell me you, at _least_ , had ecto-weapons on you. Ghosts are much more active at night."

"Always. Danny's practically _attached_ to the things," Tucker said, then looked just as surprised as the rest of the Team that he'd said that last part out loud. He _really_ needed some sleep.

Maddie softened. "Well, I suppose you didn't hurt anything. But, don't think staying up all night gets you out of school or work, today." She added, to her children. "I still expect you to be on time, _and_ stay awake. You can take a nap, when you get home." Jazz and Danny nodded.

Seeming satisfied, Maddie turned and headed downstairs to start making (probably-sentient) breakfast. Jack seemed about to follow, and the kids' shoulders sagged with relief.

"SO, WHAT DID YOUR THEORY PROVE?" Jazz, Sam, and Tucker froze.

"Hiccuping, repeatedly, in a bitter, old man's ear, at four in the morning will, basically, get you whatever you want," Danny answered, smiling innocently. His father paused a moment, processing his son's words.

Then, the giant man-child grinned. "COOL! I'LL HAVE TO TRY THAT TRICK, SOMETIME! GOOD WORK, KIDS!" And, with that, he ducked back inside. Probably to eat all the ham.

* * *

Team Phantom split up to _try_ and get a few minutes of sleep, before school. After his own (way too short) nap, Danny sat in the kitchen with Jazz, trying to eat a bowl of cereal. He felt lousy, though he figured that's what happened when you hiccuped for seventy-two hours, straight. He, finally, gave up, putting his bowl in the sink, and heading towards the living room.

He paused at the kitchen doorway. "Hey, Jazz?" He said, his eyes bleary with sleep.

"Mmm?" She answered, eyes not leaving her book.

"You're a terrible liar."

She looked up at him, confused. "I don't know whether to be insulted or flattered."

"But, that was a really good excuse you gave Mom and Dad."

"Ummm... Thanks?"

"Thanks for helping us out, Jazz."

She smiled. "No problem, little brother. Now, go take a shower. I can smell you from here. And, I can _still_ see some gum in your hair."

He chuckled. "Okay, okay. And, you're no spring daisy, yourself."

"Hey," She threw a loose _Cheerio_ that'd fallen on the table at him. It bounced off the wall next to the kitchen doorway, as he left. He walked to the stairs, sniffling.

 ***A-A-A-Achoo***

Danny sniffed again, wiping his nose on his arm. (Hey, he was going to take a shower anyhow, and he was _way_ too tired to care.) He looked up, fully intending to head for the bathroom, but stopped.

"Oh, boy," He said, looking at the now-frozen wall and bottom steps in front of him.

"Hey, Danny. Did you know that-" Jazz said, stopping mid-sentence, when she looked up from her book and noticed the living room's new ice feature.

"Oh, boy," Danny said again, as his little clone/cousin phased through the frozen wall, and floated in front of him.

"Danny-"

 ***A-A-A-Aaaa-Achoo***

Suddenly, a bolt of lightning flew from the littlest half-ghost's nose, charring a piece of the carpet. Thankfully, though, that section of carpet was already singed from one of Jack's inventions, so it was unlikely anyone would notice. "-I have a problem," She said, hoarsely, drooping in the air.

Danny sniffed, sounding stuffed up, even to his own ears. "Oh, boy."

* * *

 **The End.**

 **...Or, is it?**

* * *

 **AN: Hey, everybody! :) Yay! My first chapter-fic, officially complete! The sequel goes up next week! Please, don't hate me...**

 **I do not own** ** _Cheerios_** **. Unless you count the box in my pantry.**

 **Fluffyearedpuppy: I am too! XD I can't wait to start up the sequel! XD**

 **A special thanks to my friend, Aspiretobeawriter, for the 101st cure of this fic,** **Cure #101: Eat Chilli and drink milk and honey** **.**

 **This was originally going to be fifteen chapters long, but I decided that the place I split fourteen and fifteen wasn't any good, and just stuck 'em end-to-end. And, so, here ya go! Extra long last chapter! :))**

 **As always,  
God bless, and I hope you enjoyed! :)  
\- Ellie**

* * *

 **pbEdit: Okay, so, I couldn't figure out why no one had taken my poll from last week, but, apparently, I had it set to inot/i show up on my page... *Face-Palm* I am not so good at this, yet.../b/p**


End file.
